We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
