The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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