so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
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