hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
We need to rekindle our bromance
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
