Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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