Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
barbara walters just said penis...
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Randomize