He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
You smell like stripper and shame
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
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