I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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