in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
