i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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