i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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