you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
