She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
