You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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