yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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