i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
My vagina is officially offended.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize