When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize