I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
