SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
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