No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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