just come out here and I will go home with you...
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".