i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
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I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
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Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
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