No awkward lesbian experiences without me
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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