508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
thus making me awesome and them whores
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
