Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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