Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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