yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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