so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
