Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I don't think brook has ever known best
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
