cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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