weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
My penis needs a shock collar
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
