I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize