He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Enjoy the penises
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
