apparently the secret to your success is patron
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
