well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize