I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
