brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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