he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
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