my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Randomize