hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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