I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
