I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
this hospital has no fireball
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Randomize
