We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
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