we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
They have beer where we have blood.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
