If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck