Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
