bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
