He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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