Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
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