what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
